Leadership Role to Drive Positive Results

Leadership Role to Drive Positive Results

Human emotions are intricately linked to the results we experience in life, both personally and professionally. In a workplace, results—such as project outcomes, sales figures, or client feedback—trigger strong emotional responses in individuals and teams. Success can generate joy, pride, and motivation; disappointing results, on the other hand, frequently bring pain, anxiety, and self-doubt. As leaders, understanding this emotional landscape is crucial for shaping a healthy, productive organisational culture.

The Result Cycle: A Leadership Perspective

To lead effectively and foster positive outcomes, one must understand the continuous cycle that connects results with behaviour, actions, thinking, and experience. The dynamic feedback loop—Behaviour → Actions → Result → Experience → Thinking → Behaviour—demonstrates how outcomes are not isolated events, but the result of a continuous process. This forms the foundation of everyday decision-making and performance. Each phase informs and influences the next, creating a self-sustaining cycle that determines future performance, emotional states, and team culture. Understanding this cycle is essential for leaders striving to drive positive results.

Actions are driven through behaviour.

The decisions you take and the way you execute tasks are influenced by your behaviour. Behaviour encompasses how you interact with others, how you communicate your intent, and how you carry out responsibilities. It is the collective expression of attitude, values, and habits that shape day-to-day operational activities.

Behaviour is shaped by your thinking

The way you perceive situations, interpret information, and process emotions heavily influences your behaviour. Thinking is a cognitive framework, built from your beliefs, assumptions, and mental models that govern your interactions with the world.

Thinking is caused by experiences you have had over time

Both positive and negative experiences leave emotional and cognitive imprints that filter into your mindset. These experiences inform your outlook on challenges, opportunities, and relationships, shaping predispositions in thought.

Experiences themselves are driven by the results and their interpretations

Each outcome and the context in which it occurs become part of your lived experience. How you frame these experiences—whether as failures, lessons, or victories—affects how they influence your future thinking and behaviour.

This cyclical relationship means the results you achieve are more than mere endpoints; they are inputs that continuously feed back into the system, influencing what comes next. For leaders, understanding this loop presents a clear framework to intervene and foster positive change at every stage. 

Every action taken by a leader or a team member not only leads to a specific result but also influences the emotional tone and expectations for what comes next. Actions, guided by intentions and behaviours, become the foundation for future outcomes.

Leadership Influence at Every Stage

Every action taken by individuals or teams is a visible demonstration and consequence of deeper behavioural patterns and cognitive thinking. A leader’s action—whether it’s a strategic decision, delegation, or feedback delivery—sets the tone for the resulting team outcomes. Actions affect morale, set expectations, and signal priorities.

- Results: Great leaders encourage their teams to take bold actions—even if it risks failure—instead of placing all focus on results and outcomes. They reward courage and initiative while still providing clear, constructive feedback to highlight learnings and address shortcomings. By creating a safe environment for failure, leaders empower individuals to be decisive and innovative, which ultimately improves performance and engagement.

- Actions: Leaders are part of the cycle too—their actions stem from their own self-awareness and understanding of this feedback loop. Recognizing personal blind spots and being open to growth ensures leadership actions model adaptability. Frequent reviews, open dialogue, and empowering team members to take ownership of initiatives foster an environment where proactive, aligned actions become the norm.

- Behaviour: The most effective way to shape team and organisational behaviour is through consistent, disciplined demonstration of the values and behaviours a leader expects. By leading with integrity and reliability, leaders create a model for the team. Providing feedback on behaviours, often through thoughtful questioning rather than immediate judgment, helps uncover the motivations behind actions and encourages ownership.

- Thinking: Perhaps the most challenging yet vital task for leaders is shaping the collective mindset and culture. Every individual brings unique experiences and perspectives, making cultural alignment complex. Open, consistent communication—reinforcing key values, the mission, and desired mindsets—is essential to gradually shape thinking. Leaders must recognize that mindsets shift with consistent reinforcement and, when needed, be willing to replace counterproductive perspectives to maintain cohesion.

- Experience: Sharing stories, narratives, and real-life case studies is a powerful way for leaders to help teams interpret experiences constructively. Supporting individuals as they process both positive and negative experiences, and gently nudging their interpretations toward growth-oriented perspectives, ensures the cycle continues positively. Leaders who acknowledge difficulties but help extract meaning contribute to lasting resilience and optimism.

Conclusion

The result cycle is not just a theoretical model; it is a practical tool for leaders seeking to foster a resilient, empowered, and consistently high-performing organization. By influencing each stage thoughtfully—from championing safe-to-fail environments, to modelling behaviour, to reinforcing the right mindsets and guiding experience—leaders have the power to drive not just better results, but also healthier, happier teams who are equipped to thrive in the face of any outcome.

Understanding this interconnected cycle equips leaders to build resilient, empowered teams who are not deterred by setbacks but motivated by the continuous journey of learning, growth, and success.

Pronil Sengupta 

3 Nov 2025

भक्ति और आसक्ति

यह कहा जाता है के राम भक्त हनुमान जी को अपने बल और क्षमता का ज्ञान नहीं था। मगर क्या यही नहीं होना चाहिए था? अगर तूणीर में रखे बाण को यह ज्ञान हो के वह कितना घातक है, तो क्या वह यूँ ही पड़े इंतज़ार कर पायेगा के कब तूणीर धारी को आवश्यकता पड़ेगी और बाण का प्रयोग होगा। भक्ति और आसक्ति का क्या यही सच्ची परिभाषा नहीं है, के भक्त बिना किसी अहँक के प्रभु के चरणों में पड़ा रहे।  प्रभु को तुम्हारी क्षमताओं का तुमसे ज़्यादा ज्ञान है, उन सही स्थान और समय का पता है, जब तुम्हारे बलों कि आवश्यकता होगी। परमभक्त हनुमान जी का जीवन हमें भक्ति और आसक्ति का परम ज्ञान देती है। तुम्हे कितना भी लगे के तुम्हे ज्ञान है अपनी ताकतों का, पर ऐसा नहीं है।  प्रभु ही है जिन्हे तुम्हारी असल सफर और उससे बटोरे क्षमताओं का सम्पूर्ण ज्ञान है।  तथा आपकी प्रभु पर आसक्ति ही आपके सुख का सही मार्ग है।  

प्रोनिल सेनगुप्ता 

१२ मार्च २०२४ 

Khaakh yeh guman

Dhul mein mile khaakh mein

Dariya mein mile raakh mein

Kya dhoondh paoge mujhe?

Na he mai khud ko samet paunga

Ek din aise he sabko khona hai

Fir aaj kiska rona hai

Kya samet rahe ho tum

Jo le jaoge 

Inderjaal ke saikro mein do panktiya

Kala (art) ke dher mein chitrakariya

Kya dhoondh paoge?

Kala ka koi hafan nahi

Sirf hai dista dista

Jab tak tum ho, tab tak ka rishta

Zindagi mein zindagi pe

Marham youn karo koi

Ke yaad ke samundar mein

Moti jaise pade ho kahin 

Dhoond shayad fir bhi na payega koi

Par dhoondhne ki koshish bani rahe

Intni si zindagi mein

Bas itna he kar lije 

Muskurahat ki wajah na ban sako 

Magar, askho ke Karan bhi,

tum na ho kahi 

Pronil sengupta

22 Feb 24

Complex Human Being

 Experience of past and anxieties of future governs your behaviour. We all know the behaviour drives your present. We always say that situations are happening and things are occurring to you but actually it is you who is driving what is happening. Things are way deeper than these experiences and anxieties, in your subconscious you actually play all the occurrences happening to you. Like a movie it plays in your head and then it happens in reality. These plays are governed by thoughts, which in turn is influenced by the experiences of past and anxieties of future. Deep rooted beneath these thoughts are tendencies. Tendencies are driven by the experiences through results of what you have done in past and the feelings derived from the results very slowly and gradually transforms these tendencies. Thus tendencies are far older than your age. If you do not believe in reincarnations you would not deny DNA, tendencies are passed on from generation to generation through DNA. The tendencies translates into your anatomy and then the secretions are based on anatomy and thus governs the behaviour. This is what we commonly understand as karmic cycles. But this is not the end of everything, deeper than the tendencies are the vibration. There is a certain vibration at your tiny particle soul level and the vibration is so strong it grows into frequencies and modulate in every cell of your body and even grow outside your body. These vibrations are deep rooted not only the karmic and DNA cycle but even the ecosystem of millions of years. The particles which made you and the five elements affects your frequency. Beyond five elements is time which is crucial part of your vibration. Thus a human is known as a complex being. 

Now why I am writing this and sharing the wisdom, to help you all to understand the depth of what is happening around you. It is easier being said that stay in present but then how when mind is full of feelings governed by past and future. Even if I have trained myself to exist without feelings of past and future still I am not liberated from pain and disparity. Even if I am good in visualising still after some time I fall back. Even I am controlling my thought it would be lot a better life occurrence but may not be perfect. Important is to set the tendencies by repeated good karma by controlled thinking and the perfection is achieved by cleansing the vibrations. This is not easy but practise and conscious living is what helps you lead there.

Lengthy to read and complex to understand. Not an easy task to comprehend or share everything, even books are not enough and this can only be felt. 

Comment like share if it resonated with you.

Pronil sengupta

9 Dec 2023

पहचान

 पहचान 

रहता हूँ भीड़ में, तन्हाई दिल में लिए

आया था अकेला मैं, जाऊंगा खाख हाथ में लिए 

सुबह की रौशनी में, गीत गुनगुनाता हु 

रात के अँधेरे में, अपने साये से भी अनजाना हु 

यूं तो ज़िन्दगी में, सब कुछ हासिल है 

कुछ है नहीं मगर इस महफ़िल में 

चेहरे में हसी लिए, जज़्बात दफनाता हु 

लोगो को आस पास खुश देख ही लुफ्त पाता हु 

रहना तो मई भी चाहता हु बंजारों सा 

घूम घूम बिन किनारे नदी के धारो सा 

यादों में बसना चाहता हु ईश्वर की कला 

चाहता हूँ रब की रचनाओं से रूबरू होना 

ज़िन्दगी तो जीनी है अपनों के साथ 

पथ्थरो के राह पे तो चलना है अकेला 

सपनो को पूरा हम भी करेंगे 

बस बटे हुए है अपनों और अपने के दरमियान… 

प्रोनिल 

(१० दिसंबर २०१४)

Happy Holi Om Namah Shivay!!!

Last year two days back was holi, this is the time when few cases of corona in India was spotted. It was keral few months back but then in March it was more instances across more states in India. Prime minister urged people not to play holi. Today after an year when the disease is widespread, vaccination is in progress, people are thinking on what would be and should be our stand on Holi this year. It would be more of self governance and wisdom which will guide us this year. Each individual would be empowered to take decisions. Some of the organized society and states might come up with Norms but would it stop the people coming out with colors and water? Today on MahaShivaratri I pray for abundant wisdom, pray for courage and pray to stay greatful. The journey of success starts from being greatful, until you are greatful for the half of bread you have in hand to probably not even a quarter of your appetite, god will not find motive to give you more. The cook will not recieve the positive energy to feed you with positivity and there you get into the cycle of complain and not having. On the other side, a greatful person attracts the abundance attracts the positivity and to have more. The other strength which god has given to each human is hope and that is why we are even thinking about festival of color. Having hope is great, but with greatfulness you need the wisdom to take correct decisions. Human life is based on choices, just a second before I had a choise to hit post or not. Fighting with inhibitions of being judged, being trolled, being praised, being ignored... all needs a courage to take right decision, make right choise and follow your heart. A right decision would be harmless to society, yourself and your loved ones. A right decision can be wrong to someone but would have a good intent and a long term benefit. Standup with courage, have wisdom to take right decision, have love, generousity, and be greatful!!! Think shall we laugh on covid playing holi and hugging each other or shall we sacrifice one more year and have the faith on health workers and system to fight with it.

Pronil Sengupta

11 March 2021

A small story of Bicycle

 My love with Bicycle started in 1990-91 when I was in grade 4 or 5. Those days we used to get Bicycles on rent, Rs2/- per hour. My dad used to take me out. He used to hold the cycle career from back, while I used to paddle. Dad used to say don’t worry, I am holding it keep paddling. One day I realized while paddling Dad’s voice getting thinner and he is still saying keep paddling don’t worry I am holding it. With corner or my eyes I saw he is far and standing and I am on my own paddling. That is the day I learned cycling. Years later he coached me riding scooter and then car... different story some other time. 

 

We could not buy a cycle then. Couple of years later I was in grade 8 or 9, one of my class mate Jai Prakash, he used to commute to school by cycle. A red one junior size. One day, he urged to sell his cycle. I was excited to get a second hand cycle opportunity, I discussed with my parents and my mom agreed, it was negotiated at Rs300/- for a deal. I started traveling the 1km distance from my home to school in that. Few weekend rounds in my colony. However, I kept chewing, champ chewing gum and kept collecting wrappers for a BSA SLR, I could not win ever.

Class 10 exam results came in 1995. As promised my dad and I went to Hero Jet showroom, I wanted a Hero Ranger, red one, however that was Rs1600/- and a middle class always negotiate the value for money and I settled down with a Hero Jet a black one at Rs1100/-. Junior cycle was already sold to third party by this time. This black hero jet became hero of my life. We used to bring it to our room at night, keeping it downstairs would mean you will not see it next morning. My brother used to keep rotating the paddle by hand, I used to apply game, while the Jet standing on its main stand. Jet and I used to go to bring my brother from school. My brother used to sit on the rod between seat and handle. I remember one day, I asked my brother to hold the handle while I paddle. And in few seconds we were down on road. Class 11, I took maths coaching, Universal tuition center, I met my best friend Shishir there. Shishir, Jet and I became the next best trio, from tuition centre to his home, our weekend rides to nearby café to have some choley tikki etc. We took some long ride too, Dwarka, Najafgadh, Kakrola, Ramapark, Subhash nagar, for different motivations. Adolescence kicked in and you start trying new stunts, cycling while standing, cycling without holding handles, cycling by not holding handles and not paddling, balancing with lowest possible speed. Hero Jet and I did lot of such things. I was in collage first year, 1998, when as usual, I went to Shishir’s home, locked my cycle, we both went to bus stand, went to college, when we came back, we did not find the Cycle. That day we were real upset, losing the Jet. Life took different turns, collage, then MBA, so the need of cycle was kind of blurred out, scooter, bike and then car. Time flew, 10years later, I started feeling the love for cycle once again, this was not a need driven, just a desire that I should have one. Couple of years more, in 2013 or so, I used to see my friends in Delhi has started a kind of cycle routine over weekend, and they used to go in early morning, few km’s and then sit together to have tea, chit chat and come back. I got motivated, here in Hyderabad, I tried forming such group, but never martialize. Passion, Love, Need when everything is high, then only you meet a goal.

 

Need found its definition, a work out regime, the love started rising through nostalgia, passion I yet to form. My son’s cycle is staying at home, hardly he rides a Km or so, because, he makes me run along, and I am not a runner. Today, when in evening me and my son went out with our cycle, we took 4Km round.

 

This year beginning, I completed 40, and my brother in law, more like a brother, a friend, he knew I plan to buy a cycle, he sent me the money to gift one. I was supposed to get that in March, but we know we were locked down. After unlock, I was not going out much, but then today, I finally made a plan to visit Decathlon. Thank you Amaresh joining me for shopping, you only know how much we have discussed about cycle trip 6yrs back.

 

Exploring AP - Nagarjuna - Suryalanka - Vijaywada

Its been a long time that I have shared my experience of being ghumakkar with you all. Indeed, it was been a long pause to my passion to explore mother earth on a driving wheel. After the mesmerizing experience of Himachal, Leh and other places in north, three years back I settled down in Hyderabad with a motive to explore south. Well, given all odds, finally, this may I could revive my Driving spree. With a small overnight camping in ananthgiri hills just 70km away from my home, I could break free to re-start. This time back again with a 900km in 36hrs of experience exploring south.Read more

Lives Gods and Evils

We all are human and we all are lives, in life we all come across situations where we have choices. We come across difficulties and misery, we come across happieness. We always wanted to decipher the law of happieness and misery, we always wanted to find the reasons behind, we think if we know those reasons we can be always happy!!!. We always relate Gods to good and Evils to bad and name everything which happens bad to evil. However, is that true? Is God always good? Is Evils always causing bad?

Our Lives are a battle ground observing battle of gods and evils all the time. We are surrounded by gods and evils, goods and bads, the positives and the negatives. We always say that when there is happiness there is grief, when there is good times there are bad and we say that god tests us. Really, god tests us? Does god need us to be tested, why? If he is god then he is good, and good cannot give bad time, good cannot cause an evil effect. God can test but god cannot give us misery, grief and sorrows. Death is a fact, god has to take us all but have you ever thought about natural deaths, even there god give us a preparatory time, the rounds of hospitals or make the close family mentally prepared. But, god does not create accidents or unnatural deaths. Gods are positives and positive will only cause positive.

Then why misery occurs, why sadness comes, why grief attacks? Those are caused by evils, the negatives the bads. As I mentioned above, there is a war, since the beginning of the universe between god and evil, between good and bad, between positive and negative. We need to attract positive to stay positive and get all happiness. However, those who worship god get misery at times, right? Do they not attract enough positives? They do, but still they get misery at times, why? Imagine a war, or you are into a war, to win, whom would you attack the most? You would attack the one who is most powerful and those who are becoming more powerful. Same does the bad, same does the evil, same does the negatives, more you attract positive more you become favorite of god and worst enemy of evil. On the other hand, it’s been a belief that those who are on immoral, wrong path are seen happier and successful in lives. Have you also thought the same ever? Why, because, another war strategy, you would like to recruit more army, attract the army of opponent to be on your side and fight on your behalf. Exactly what that evil does, negatives do, and they attract us to recruit for their motives with lucrative packages. The path of immorality looks easy, because that’s the juice of the package, however the moment you join the army, you become a slave to evil, you become part of their army and you would be used to cause misery in other’s life. Now you can connect that why immoral, corrupt people often cause misery to others and at times their own family. They have chosen to attract negatives in their lives. Evils distract one from the path of purpose and mislead through many lucid offerings. Evils like to recruit people to their world and offer them lucrative packages and use them to meet their purpose.

Life is beyond the birth and death and those how joins the army of evil to rejoice the bribe, will be born again in lives, staying unknown of past and knowing god and evil, positive and negative from scratch. They would definitely need more effort to attract positives because of the backlog of negatives. You know now, why some are born with golden spoon and some born in misery. To break free, life and death to prosper in life, to attract happiness, wealth, relationship, one needs wisdom to attract positives.

To practice yield positive first you need to free yourself from negative feelings. You need to control what you say, you need to control your anger, you need to control your mind, your eyes, your genitals, and your taste buds. Once you attain that, you reach the uttermost level of positivity. You stop thinking negatives, you stop causing negatives and you stop getting negatives. Then the army of evil to reach you would need to cut through your soldiers, your general, hundreds of others. History is evident, whenever, evil is then face to face with god and other utmost positives, they could not withstand the rays and light and perished to the darkness.

Nature is abundant, just take the first step towards replacing your negative thoughts with positives, start respecting women, the food you eat, the animals and other people around, start meditating to god every day, practice yoga and exercise daily. Replace hatred with love, replace greed with need, and believe in receiving than craving for something and saying aloud that you are not born to get that. You are born to get what you want, what you say, what you think and what you ask for, condition you stay firm with your belief to the positivity of life.

I tried to keep the thought crisp so that you read and get the message, I would love to do further conversation on it, so comment here if you have some questions. Share the wisdom of life to save the world from evil and negatives.

Zindagi hai badi khoobsurat!!!

आनन् फानन में कुछ शब्दों  का बयां था
कुछ लोगो से मुठभेढ़ कुछ ज़िन्दगी से जंग था
मानो के बहुत जी चुके थे
मौत के बाद एक नई शुरुआत की इल्तेजा थी
ऐसे ही तनी भोह के साथ उस रोज़
चला था घर से
चलते ही अगले मोड़ पे मिला एक तिपहिया
मुड़ा ऐसे के जिगर मुह तक आ गया
गुस्सा तो था ही और मेरा दुपहिया भिड़ते बचा
गुर्रा के जैसे ही देखा मैंने उसे
वोह जानो ठाहके मारने लगा
मानो कह रहा था के "क्यों अभी न मरना तुझे"
मै भी हस पड़ा और हुआ अहसास
क्रोध में चाहे कितनी लगे ज़िन्दगी बेमानी
मौत  देखकर है फटती सबकी
यों ही फिर मंज़र बदलने लगा
लगा जैसे पड़ोस के मंदिर के बाबा
आ सवार हो गये पीछे
एकाएक सब दूर दूर के पोस्टर के लोग लगे चलने
कोई कुकर ले पूछ रही "क्या बनाना है?"
तो कोई सूट पहन लगा नाचने
मानो ज़िन्दगी एक  पल में दुविधा
तो दूसरे पल लगा हँसाने
यह पहेली चाहे जो भी हो
मगर ज़िन्दगी है बड़ी खूबसूरत

Death State....

At abysmal each one of us might have felt to die. There is lots of speculation on what happens after death. Well I have a thought on what happens after death. May be it would help you to understand the same and may be it help to create a value of life even at abysmal.

Curious to know what happens after death, let’s go to a state of death for a while, find a quiet corner to sit in relaxing way, loosen up all your limbs, feel the numbness in your limbs, the aching feet... allow move down the pain from your legs from your toe, do the same to your arms, feel they are no longer there, you are relaxed... now start berating slowly... slowly... deeply and slowly... gradually move out of all the thoughts...free you up for a while from all your troubles and trivia keeping you worried, think nothing, concentrate on your breath... now we would be going to the death state.... slowly slowly.... you are getting no noise around, you are unable to hear anything.... your do not have any limb to touch anything or move.... your body is getting numb gradually.... you cannot feel touch... you cannot feel cold, hot, air or breeze.... its silence with no feeling.... your nose is not giving you any fragrance or any odor.... you are not tasting anything.... the dryness of mouth is gone... the wetness is not felt... there is no pain..... Now slowly close your eyes..... While you close your eyes... keep following the state you are in..... now stop you breath for a slow count of 10 to 15 or to as much you can....

That's it.... you are back from that suffocating experience isn't? Till you stopped your breath, everything was soothing and painless and the moment breath is gone you moved from a yogic state to death state and that's what death is. It’s still you there after death but you do not have a medium or body to communicate, you do not have a body to smell, touch, hear, see or breathe... you do not know where you are what you are... you can’t feel the breeze which is blowing you carrying your energy particle from where to where until you find a lady praying to be a mother and you with her breath with the breeze enter her body and travel to the womb causing heartbeat in her fetus and allow her to celebrate your arrival.... you move again from a death state to life.

Well Life and Death are two terms give to have a body or not to have. Life you are inside a body and death you are out of a body waiting and suffocating to breathe again. It’s the life which has power to create change, it is the life which give you the power to feel, see, breathe, touch, eat, taste, smell... you have the power to cause yourself the abysmal or hope. Death state does not have that power. Let death come naturally and let nature command you to change the body, and till then let us enjoy every breath and every moment and use it to shape the world and cause a change. Life is precious!!!

No Smoking!!!

I joined the club of smoking way back in the year 2000. At that time started for fun with one cigarette as a desert to dinner. Time past and the taste gained pace, imperfection became so perfect that it was very difficult to trace down the ethical barrier of pre 2000 era of my life. Before I broke my ethical barrier I used to believe that smoking is ill, such a strong belief that other than my dad all of the smokers in this world was demons.

During my graduation, when I was in my second year, in 1999, my childhood friend started enjoying the drag, initially I felt bad and did not join the club. But since he was my best friend at that time who can never be wrong, I started questioning my ethical barrier, was to be pedantic for a 84mm stick is right, is it so bad? Actually I was seeing few people who are not demon but still smokes. The thought of trying the stick some day was seeded by me in my mind, the food and water to the seed was a tip from my uncle way back when I was 15. One day he said to me, its nothing wrong in trying a bad habit, one should actually try everything, however, wrong is the age when you try. He suggested me to try everything after you turn 21, when you are matured enough to understand that you are only trying and not get addicted. Today when I have crossed 1year and 4months quitting smoking, I think, might he be right, but it took me 10 years to come out of the gusty smog.

I went to hostels for pursuing my MBA where I tried my first cigarette, but only at desert at dinner, believe me no bollywood style cough or feel bad factor for me. May be the only reason to get continue! May be by observation I have already learned the correct style of inhaling. My heart was throbbing, with excitement and fear, in few moments from now, I would be changing my entire belief which i was carrying from past 20 years. In few moments I was about to break my barrier of ethics. I was about to enter a new world of painkiller pills. As smoker boastly said, in tension -cig, in happiness -cig, in sadness -cig, it rains -cig, its hot -cig, its too cold - cig. Cig was associated with all moods and climate.

Goldflake kings to Navycut, and Navycut to Goldflake, from Desert to tea break then the journey just gained the pace. The club became larger, soon I started meeting people or old pals and discovering that they also smoke. Soon I found that my entire surrounding is smoker, even those, whom i used to thought were teetotalers. The nieche build up, the boasting build up and I was enjoying. In just 3years I started felt the first craving for smoke, prior to that I do not used to smoke in weekends when I was home, but offlate our group of 3 close friend switched to an inferior brand as Goldflake king became dearer. I think its that brand which caused craving of nicotine. Feeling thirsty, can't concentrate, mouth was getting dry and throught was demanding something, sleep was not going away from eyes, I had to go out and light one stick, as soon as I inhaled the smoke the pungent thick little chilly little bitter thing moves to lungs a spark of energy is felt in the body. The blood stream stated flowing, heart beat increased and mood started shifting from irritation to good.

That was the second time when I thought to quit smoking, it was a dependency and I do not like any dependency in life. With dependency you are handicapped to perform your best and fulfill your dream. First time when I tried quitting was when my mother boasted to someone that my son would never pick up any bad habit. I sank in guilt to quit smoking before they get to know. I broke all the sticks I had, threw it and thought never to pick them. I consoled myself, before buying a new cig, justify the cigs i just destroyed. The feeling of quiting the club started making a home in me.

But, like every smoker thinks I also thought after every cigerette that this was the last one. But soon you will have craving, and the craving is so damaging, you get irritated, you can fight with your spouse and friend and the loss looks bigger than continue smoking. Many a time I had a smoke table discussion to quit, most of the smoker did want to quit, some tried nicotine gums, some used will power, some were new so could stay away for couple of months but at the end all end up on smoke table conference. Over the time, i developed a cough, lost my stamina to run or walk for long, let aside foot ball or cricket, even while having meals I started sweating, sweating was not there before I used to smoke, I started snoring, I developed acidity. I was ruining my body a temple and harming the god inside. Let aside money which was spent.

Like others, I tried gum, I requested my wife to consider my ill behaviour out of irritation while I try to quit, and tried to help myself through many blogs and tips on internet. People used to say have coffee, but when I did I ran for a cig, it kicked the craving. People say stay away from smoker, thats again a hadicap situation which I never agree.

In April 2010, my wife went to my inlaws for a month, I thought this is the best time to give it a shot. If I fail she won't know, and If I succeed it would be a surprise to her. I analyzed and thought a lot and found the main reason of failure of earlier attempt. What is a Cigerette, not only it creates a nicotine dependency in body, it creates a social accociation with many friends, it creates a psycological and situational associations as described above, like, it rains we smoke, it doesn't rains we smoke, its cold we smoke etc. So, quiting cigrette is a task of paitence. What happens is, when ever you try to quit smoking, you quit it for hours, days or may be a week, supressing your craving but at last you give up and smoke. Its something like holding your breath and after 30sec you start taking double the amount of oxygen you normally breath. After that first cigerette after the break, you demoralize, and start thinking i can't quit, and your counter of those many hours, days or week is reset to zero. The tip is initially do not reset your counter, rather keep moving with stats like, one cig in last 2 days then two cigs last 5 days and keep moving. That does not at all mean you reduce your number of cigerette, that only means that, you still have quit but with a relaxation of few cigerettes when you can't at all live without it. Don't blame if you have one cig even afte qutting, rather pat your back and move on with more will power that no more cig. Within 7 to 10 days your body need of nicotine would be over, now the only craving fight is psychological and not physical. Now what will happen is, every situation in which you used to smoke, you will feel like smoking, one by one break each barrier, it rains, go out with a friend who smoke, hold your feelings, don't smoke and come back to work. Next time it rains, you will not have that urge. You need to break the accociation of cigerrette with your psychology one by one.

For initial days, start feeling the craving and start enjoy the craving with a thought that its something new and it will go away if you smoke. Start enjoying that craving. Remember, you need to make friends the enemy of your enemy at times.

Hope this reading can make you think about your habit, and wish you all the best to come out of it!!! Its bee more than a year for me now, a task which I thought is immpossible. Thanks to my wife and my friends who was there to support me and understand me when I was having a mood swing for this make over. I also thank one of my collegue, Chandan, who became my inspiration and gave daily tips of motivation to achive this milestone.

Its raining today and I am enjoying the rain without smoke, i am free, and out of my impedements!!!!

Khajur bada ke Taad

खजूर बड़ा के ताड़

किसी ज़माने दो प्रेमी
एक खजुरी तो एक ताड़ी
खजुरी ने खाया फल
बीज बिखेर बोला हे ताड़ी
प्रेम का फूल खिले यहाँ
ताड़ी ने भी खाया ताड़
गेर के बीज बोला हे खजूर
प्रेम का फूल खिले तो यहाँ!

बीते बरस बीते साल
बरखा धरती इश्वर का कमाल
धुप छाओं खेल खेल
एक ताड़ तो एक खजूर का पेड़
दोनों के पत्ते उलझ उलझ
हवा में मस्त मादक
बारिश में झूम झूम
खेल खेल ताड़ खजूर

बीते बरस बीते साल
बरखा धरती इश्वर का कमाल
बढ़ने लगा ताड़ बढ़ने लगा खजूर
किरणों की चाहमें एक देखे पूरब
तो किरण पाने को दूजा पश्चिम
कुछ और टेढ़ा कुछ और झुका
हवा में फिर भी मस्त मादक 
पर धीरे धीरे दिशा बदली
आअकर बदला, बदल गया कद

बाकी था कुछ तो बीते बरस ने
बदल दिया रुत के साथ
बदल गयी सोच  
क्यों की ज्यों ही लगे फल
तो एक था खजूर एक था ताड़
फैली इर्ष्य फैला अहं
ताड़ खजूर का प्रेम ताड़ ताड़

बहस में बोले ताड़ मै बड़ा
खजूर बोला मै भी कम कहाँ
फल तक आना हे आसान
तन हे मेरा सीढ़ी नुमा
ताड़ बोले मेरा फल भरे पेट
तो ताड़ी दे मादक तरल
बुझाये प्यास करे मादक
पी ले तू भी भुला ले ग़म
खजूर कहे , हे ताड़  
तू कर रहा है मादकता का प्रचार
मेरा फल सूखे तो भी आये काम
भरे पेट चले सालो साल

यों हे बहस चलती रही
भूले दोनों, के जड़े
अब भी, दोनों की उलझी पड़ी
तेज़ हवा से एक दुसरे को 
दोनों बचाते है अब भी
भूला ताड़  के खजूर के कांटे
करते थे रक्षा उसकी डांगर से 
जब ताड़ था जवान
और भूला खजूर के
ताड़ की चुम्बिश सहलाती थी
भरती थी कांटो की जलन 

बीते बरस बीते साल
बरखा धरती  इश्वर का कमाल
बिजली इंसान कुल्हाड़ी कराल
कटे दोनों पड़े हुए थे
अट्टालिका का काम शुरू हुआ था
प्रेम की धरती से फूटे 
दोनों पड़े धरती पे लहू लुहान
जड़े अभी भी सोच रही
क्या यही थी परिनती

चंद पल थे मुट्ठी में
बिता लेता इर्ष्य द्वेष में
या फिर हस्त चहकते  
लहलहा लेता बरखा में
बाहों में बाहें डाले
अपनी तारीफ़ ना कर 
एक दुसरे के तारीफ़ में
शायद होता सकूँ 
दोनों के दिल में तब जब
धरती पे गिरते समाये भी
दोनों की टहनिय भी
जड़ो की  तरह उलझ उलझ
टकर टकर भिड भिड
गिरती ज़मीन पे

फल बिखरते लुढ़कते संग संग
कदमो पे आ गिरते किसी प्रेमी के
जो खाता एक ताड़ी
जो खाता एक खजूरी....

प्रोनील
(२६ अगस्त १०)


Khajur bada ke Taad by Khajur bada ke Taad is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License.

रुक के मुस्कुराने को

रुक के मुस्कुराने को

ज़िन्दगी की रज़म में यों उलझे पड़े हम
अपने मलाल पे मुस्कुराने का मौका पा लेते हैं
जब पीछे मूढ़ कर उन रास्त राहों को देखते हैं
जिनपे शाद हो हम दौड़ा करते थे
जब जबीन पे बेफिक्री का मकाम होता था
आसमान नीचे और ज़मीन ऊपर था....

योंही दौड़ते दौड़ते ना जाने वोह रास्त राह
कब पेचीदा हो चली
ज़िन्दगी की रफ़्तार यों बढ़ सी चली
कब ना जाने मजमा इकठ्ठा हो चला
और वहीँ हम अपने बचपन को ज़ाइ कर बैठे
कब ना जाने वोह गीली सी ज़मी वोह हवा की नमी
खुश्क और ख़ाक में बदल गई
वक़त यू गुज़रा के खबर ही ना हुई

फिर भी आज हम उम्मीद का दामन पकडे
अपने इतिहास के वोह पन्ने टटोलते हैं
चंद पल मुस्कुराके
फिर से ज़िन्दगी के रज़म में उलझ पड़ते हैं
जब   यह कार ख़तम होगा
तो फिर से उम्मीद हैं के राह रास्त होगी
उसी पे चलेगा कारवां
और खुदा से मुलाकात होगी.

प्रोनिल (२८ अगस्त २००६)



रुक के मुस्कुराने को is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported License.